Caleb

Caleb. Oh my sweet, darling Caleb boy, with his red fuzzy hair and pointy ears and a smile that makes anyone sigh. 

Caleb has won the hearts of so many people in his 5 little months of life. He was the first one born, yet the smallest. He was “triplet A” in the womb, perfectly head down, “the gatekeeper.” It was his job to keep everyone tucked inside until 36 weeks. He did his job well.

Caleb is the blob on the right

 The doctors showed me his little round head over the operating curtain first. 
“Your first son,” the doctor said before pulling him back down again.
 Levi and James were nestled together; their heads laid against each other during their development. Therefore, their heads are oval and big and manly. Caleb, on the other hand, was born with a perfectly round little head, just like his sister Evie. 

Caleb's round little head on the left

And just like his sister Evie, I noticed  how he rested his head. Always to the right. No matter what we did, he preferred the right. 

First Bath: Evie

First Bath: Caleb

Some of you know that we noticed a very severe flat spot in the back of Evie’s head when she was a few months old. At nine months, after being examined by a cranial specialist at OHSU, she was fitted with her very own pink helmet.

For three months, our sweet girl wore her helmet 24/7 in order to reshape her soft head. The good news is that it worked! However, the whole procedure was expensive and time consuming. 

And I was that mom with a baby in a helmet. 

I swore I’d never let that happen again. I mean, what are the odds of having one, let alone TWO children in helmets! However, when I looked down at little sweet Caleb sleeping in his crib at a few weeks old, I noticed the very same head tilt. 

During the next few weeks, despite my greatest efforts, I was unable to keep his head from tilting to the right. And then at about 1.5 months, I noticed his misshaped head and I had a horrible feeling that he was headed in the same direction as his sister.

 Sure enough, 5 months later, I sat with my boy Caleb in the same room at OHSU, and he was examined by the same doctor as Evie.

 After his examination, the doctor scribbled down the same diagnosis: Severe assymetical head shape. 
Prescription: Helmet.  


So we are headed down the same path. We’ve been through it once, so it’s not as overwhelming or devastating as it was with Evie. 

Out of all the chidlren, Caleb and Evie seem to have a special connection. Caleb just can’t take his eyes off his interesting sister. Even when she teases him and pokes him, he gives her the biggest smile and a full bellied giggle. Whenever I ask Evie which brother she wants to take with us on an outing, it’s always Caleb.

 I have to say, their newborn pictures look strikingly similar.

Evie

Caleb

My grandma was in town visiting for 2 weeks, and she suggested we just take Evie and one of the boys to the farmers market on Saturday. We took Caleb and Evie (we do rotate the boys, I promise). Being out and about with just the two of them was SO EASY!!! John and I both felt like we could conquer the world. Caleb was so incredibly good in his little car seat stroller that I forgot we had him at times. He didn’t fuss or make a peep the whole time. He just smiled up at me with his beautiful blue eyes.  Evie was in a good mood too. In fact, everything was so wonderful that we went out for pizza! 

Suddenly, something unexpected slipped out of my mouth.  I said to John, “This is what our life was supposed to be like.” 

But immediately after those words came out of my mouth-no BEFORE I even finished saying them-I took them back in my heart. 

Which boy would I give up?! WHICH ONE?! I truly couldn’t imagine not having any one of my sons. Yes, life is a lot harder right now than it would have been if we were a “normal” young family with a toddler and a newborn…but that is not how it was supposed to be for us. 
How dare I say what I said. 

I am ashamed of myself. 

I’m realizing that with having three boys the same age, it’s hard not to compare them to eachother. James is rolling over and kicking around; both him and Levi try desperately to stand everytime I hold them upright. They’ve been putting pressure on their little legs for months now. But Caleb, he just doesn’t have any strength yet. His legs are like collapsed rubber bands. His head still bobbles around; he is the smallest of the boys. Even as a blinking light in the ultrasound at five weeks old, his little heart showed up to be the smallest one. 

I’ll never forget the first thing the doctor said to us after he turned off the ultrasound machine that day, July 19, 2013 after we discovered the three beating hearts. 
                                   “Let me talk to you about selective reduction.” 

Selective reduction?! 

He pointed to Caleb’s little blinking heart on the screen. 
“This one is the smallest. We’d do this one.” 

My Caleb. My precious, red-headed, pointy eared, assymetical headed little Caleb. They suggested-highly encouraged us-to reduce. To put a needle filled with saline into his little heart and dissolve him. 

Although I was beyond shocked and overwhelemed and scared that day we found out we’d have three babies, never could I dissolve the beating heart that was already living within me. Even though I did say to John in a moment of panic,  “we can’t do this! How are we going to do this?!" I knew we had to. 
  The doctor went on to explain all the risks for mother and babies that went along with a triplet pregnancy. The room was spinning at that point; but I remember a peace fell over me, and I knew that somehow it was going to be ok. 

This was our story and somehow we were going to get through it. 

Everytime we went in for an ultrasound and check up during those first few months, the doctor always brought up selective reduction to us. Finally, on our last visit before we’d be transfered to our regular, high risk OB/GYN, he looked me right in the eye and said, “So have you given anymore thought about keeping all these babies?” 

And I looked him right in the eyes in return and said, “We want to keep all of our children.” 

And then after that, he handed me a book about multiple pregnancy and said, “Good luck to you.”

And the pregnancy is behind me now. We are on the other side and 5 months in already.  I made sure to send that doctor one of our birth announcement cards with the pictures of our three beautiful healthy, 5 lb baby boy triplets. 

Life is harder than if we only had one baby, or even if we had just twins. 

Levi and James (4 months) Can't imagine these two boys without their brother Caleb!

                  But I will never ever regret not giving up on Caleb. 

Great Grandma love

Summer Stickiness

It is officially summer and there is that summer-kid-stickiness all over my home.  Sticky fingers seem to touch every square inch of this place!
... dripping orange popsicles .... greasy sun blocked/ sandy hands.... plops of bubble soap from the little plastic wand....

 However,  I do love all the little sweaty baby bodies clothed in nothing but a diaper that have been hanging around the house lately. ;) 

Caleb kicking it  hot baby style

 I cleaned my windows a few days ago; they were smeared and cloudy from little sticky fingerprints.

                 However, a few moments later, they were back to how they were.

This pretty much sums up my life right now: Hot, sticky and filled with needy little people. :)

Bubble soap joy

Usually in summers past (meaning pre-kid) we'd go to the  Blues Fest downtown or buy lunch from a food cart and eat it under a tree.  We'd take Sunday afternoon walks, hike in the Gorge and play in waterfalls. We'd nap. We'd watch movies late into the night and go on really cool get-aways.
 I remember meeting girlfriends and drinking iced vanilla lattes under the umbrellas at one of those cute little tables; I still see them everytime I drive past with my mini van full of children. 

Yes Please

But, we did that.:)

Now, instead my summer so far has been filled with murky public sandboxes, 
                                                                             over crowded parks, 
                                                               curiously complex kiddie fountains 
                                                              and a small blue plastic baby pool on my deck.

                                  There is lots of Sunshine and Sunblock... 

       ...Soggy sandwiches smashed in the bottom of my picnic bag... 
                 and warm water from small cloudy plastic bottles.

Sometimes it's a warm juice box.

Plastic baby pools are the best

I often go to bed before the sun sets here; and even though I am up early everyday (5 am) the sun is already shining. I am grateful for my deck, because even though I can’t venture out into the summer like I want, my deck and all the natural sunlight of the windows allows me to enjoy it from where I am. Another reason this house was hand picked for us. 

We are in the longest days of the year now, both literally and figuratively speaking. 

 The boys are five months old and just as cute as can be. 

They are all laughing. 

James rolled over and discovered his feet. 

Caleb discovered the joy of sucking on his thumb. 

And Levi loves holding toys...and his 6 month shirts are growing tight. 

Levi the man-baby

Evelyn is slowly growing into "mommy's little helper." She talks, talks, TALKS about everything! It must be in her little girl DNA.  

She follows me around and wants to be just like me. She's interested in my make up, wearing my jewelry and really wants to pierce her ears (I told her to ask Daddy about that one) She fixes the brother’s bottles when they fall over; she rocks crying babies and she fetches diapers. I can see her growing up, little by little. We have been having a sweet time together this summer.  

4th of July was a blast too. We took Evie and  our friend’s little boy Brayden to the parade in Lake Oswego.

Sweet little buds

 There was candy to collect and so much to see. Holidays like this suddenly become so much more fun when you can experience it again through the eyes of your children. 

Later in the evening we decorated the stroller and bikes and partook in our neighborhood parade, a tradition that I’ve been excited about since hearing of it when we purchased the house! The streets were filled with families, children, babies, bikes and dogs. Onlookers threw candy and cheered. Many people applauded the triplets as we proudly rolled past.

Let's get this show on the road already!

Here comes the parade!

The gathering of the parade(kinda hard to see...)

I do soak up these hot, sticky days.  The windows never stay clean and my house will always have little sand particles on the floor; but it’s a constant reminder that this house is so full of life right now and this will be a summer I will look back on and smile about. 
                                                   A precious summer indeed.