Packin up and movin out

We are  outta here in a few short days. The pictures are off the walls, there are boxes everywhere, and tomorrow night we will be sleeping on a mattress on the floor. Stuff is being packed away and shipped off to our new place across town. The anticipation of this move and our new home has been building over the past 9 months. Honestly, my heart and sights have been in our new home since we signed the ownership papers in July. I feel like I’ve been living in transition for so long and finally this is actually happening. 

The boys have outgrown their shared pack n’ play in our family room, so we’ve had to rotate one of them at night to the swing. Surprisingly, they have also outgrown their newborn clothing! I never thought that they would be in the next size in a mere 7 weeks; but they are eating, growing boys… with an abundance of 3 month size clothing stored in the new house.

 We’ve been prepping Evie about the move for months now. She has visited the new house several times, so it wont be a total shock when she finally stays. We’ve also been talking about her “big girl bed” she will transition to so that her brothers can have her crib. She talks about all this and seems to understand all that is taking place. It doesn’t seem to bother her a bit that she will soon be in a new place. 

I’ve gotten to go out on some runs and walks this week. It struck me that all these streets and paths I’ve traveled over the last 6.5 years will soon be a memory. I will have new places to explore. Even my “go-to” grocery store will be different. All this is extremely exciting to me, but I must admit, I’ve had moments of reflection about our little house on Sorrento Rd. We have many memories here, and in a small way, it makes me feel uncomfortable at the thought of another family walking around the floor where Evie took her first steps…eating dinner where we’ve hosted so many dinner parties…living in the basement John designed and built.  I know John will miss his basement. It was built with his vision and sweat, and it his is little oasis where he works and lives during the day. 
And then there are our trees. In front of our house we have the biggest sequoia trees in the area. They are over 400 years old, and I’ve always been enchanted by them. 
And there is our maple tree that turns the most beautiful orange in late October; it casts a deep fall glow throughout our kitchen every year.

 And Spring. I’m enjoying the last few days of our yellow flowers and camilas and tulips that pop out of our yard. Yes, there are things I will miss about this house. It is a charming house, one that captured my heart when I walked into it almost 7 years ago. We built so many memories inside these walls. But I am ready for the next chapter. 

I feel like our new home represents that beginning of our family of six. It has the space for us, all the rooms I dreamed to have. It’s the perfect little neighborhood with young families and quiet streets.  Sometimes during hard moments here I catch myself putting all my hope into this next space, that somehow life will be better and get easier. But I know in my heart that a home will not do this. It will make life a little more exciting for awhile, but soon it will be just our home, and we will still have the same struggles and things we must get through. 
A home will not take away sleepless nights, or sickness, or pure emotional and physical exhaustion. It wont solve our problems or fulfill our dreams. It is a place where our family will live, but how we live in it is what matters. I see this home not as a fresh start, but as a continuation of what we’ve already started nine years ago when John and I pledged to spend the rest of our days together. 

I'm so ready to a make more memories!!!

8250 Sorrento Rd
2007-2014

Christmas Parties rocked our house!

Christmas Party 2008

Many nights by our fireplace

Watching the world go by our front window

Bringing Evie home

Oh Beautiful Fall in our backyard

Book Club in the backyard July 2013

It's One Thing after Another...6 week update

The past few weeks have been frustrating, not due to fussy babies but because someone in this house always has an ailment or illness. With so many people living in such close quarters day after day, germs just get passed around...and with broken sleep cycles, immune responses are not as strong. It all started a few weeks ago when John and my in laws woke up with a stomach bug, I had mastitis, my Grandma was dehydrated and thus sick, and Evie sounded like a barking seal. We were a sorry group of people walking around here. Evie ended up having a really bad cold, which traveled to her ear causing an ear infection. Inevitably, my mom got her cold and she's been suffering with it for over a week now. It's a wicked cold, burning her lungs and causing her extreme exhaustion. She keeps trudging onward though, working and taking care of the babies despite how she feels. However, I think her lack of sleep is prolonging her healing.
Yesterday I went to the doctor because after  almost 6 weeks of healing, my incision from my c-section seems to be infected. Thus, another round of antibiotics for me. Then this morning, my grandma expressed that she thinks she's getting a head cold.
And the cycle keeps going.

I anticipated many hardships during these first few weeks, yet I seemed to overlook all this! We all try to take care of each other, insisting that the weakest one rest or go to bed early. However, I'm really ready for everyone to just feel normal again!

Speaking of feeling normal...I was able to take Evie out -just the two of us- a few mornings this past week. When I was with her, it almost felt as if the boys were all a dream. We fell back into our little routines and Evie was thrilled to be with "just mommy." I also wondered why I ever thought having one child was so difficult! ;)

Spending some time with Just Evie

We are in this transition limbo right now too. The move is happening in a week and a half, yet it's difficult to pack up because we are still very much living in this house. We are 90% certain we have a renter for our house!

And, my Dad is flying in tonight to finally meet his new grandsons! He just started a new job so he really doesn't have any vacation time. Therefore, his trip is going to be very short. He will fly in late tonight and leave first thing Sunday morning. Evie expressed that she is very excited to see grandpa.

So we carry on...feeding and taking care of the children while trying to take care of ourselves. Again, we feel so very blessed by the love and support of our community in all this.  The meals have been a huge blessing to us...and we truly can feel everyone's prayers and thoughts during this period of transition.

3-7-14: One Month update

3-7-14

Today there was sun!!! And today my mom and I took a walk, each with a stroller and a baby.
  James and Caleb had a good time in the fresh air ( I know my mom and I did too!)  Levi had to be left inside, but next time it's his turn. Yet another aspect of being born a triplet: taking turns.
I have to say that the flowers and crisp spring air renewed my spirit.

Today the boys turn one month old. We like to joke and say, "they haven't even been born yet" because their actual birthdate is March 9 (if they were one baby) We joke about it because it's such a ridiculous thing to say because these boys are growing!!! I looked in the crib this morning and gasped because they have changed so so much in a mere four weeks. They definitely don't look like premies. They were weighed on Tuesday and they are all way over 6 lbs!

James, Levi and Caleb: No premies here!

They have been eating really well and have filled out. Their eyes are open more...and they are using their lungs more too! ;)  A lot has happened in the last month actually,which is hard to believe because it seems like all we do is feed babies. :)

 IN addition to my mom being here (who has been helping us since Jan 20) my wonderful grandma flew in last Saturday. We like to call her "the baby whisperer". She raised 5 kids and 13 grand kids and now has 4 great grand kids. She is amazing, and her presence here has kept us all reasonably sane.  We have a good rhythm around here in regards to feeding schedules and sleeping/wake schedules. With four adults in the house, everyone gets a chance to sleep and this whole thing is working.

Baby Whisperer

For now, there are moments of calm and peace in the house. I even got to go to Bible study this morning with Evie, and I felt somewhat normal. However, this would have been impossible without two moms at home taking care of the fellas. :) It was nice to be with just Evie again and do something that used to be apart of our weekly routine.

There have been many sweet moments this past week.  There are four generations of women in this home (poor John!).  My mom, Grandma and I sit  a lot feeding babies, laughing and talking about many things. It even gets funnier when we each have a glass of wine at the end of the day. :)
I really am savoring these precious moments together. My Grandma and I are usually up early together and we get to sit in the dark for a few moments, sip a cup of coffee and talk about life. She is and always has been such a special person in my life. I feel so lucky that I get to share my children with her and she can experience being a great grandmother.

Evie and Levi with their Grandma and Great Grandma

Grandma love

On a completely different subject, the move is getting closer and closer!!!  John is heading this whole thing up, and he is working around the clock it seems getting things in order. A portable pod arrived on our driveway yesterday and it is already somewhat filled. I am so looking forward to getting everything moved and set up in the new house. The space will be a dream come true. The areas in this house just seems to be getting smaller and smaller as the boys get bigger and bigger! 

Here we go!!! Packing up the house! 

And...Evie had her first haircut at Little Clippers in Lake Oswego. That place is amazing... truly a hair cutting utopia for kids. They get to sit in  little cars, hold ponies,watch movies and enjoy a play area. Evie really wasn't a fan of the actual "cutting part" but she sure loved being with JUST mommy and daddy. It hasn't been just the three of us in a very long time. She was a happy little girl.

Before

A little sad

Done! :) 

                Well, ONE MONTH DOWN....a lifetime to go!

Transitioning to our New Life

It's March, and a little over three weeks ago, my life changed forever...again. There have been many events in my life-in any person's life- which make us pause and consider the absolute, life-altering, forever  change that has occurred. 

For me, these events have involved "adding people" to my life. I have to say, the first life- altering event was marriage 9 years ago. Although wonderful and rewarding and definitely something I wanted and chose to do, suddenly my life was no longer my own. Not only did my name change, but my identity as well. I was now a wife. It added responsibility to my life, and required me to consider someone else other than just myself.  

The second event that changed my life-our life- forever was having our first child Evelyn Grace. Again, although she added so much joy and purpose to our lives, our plans and agendas diminished. 

I suddenly became a mom.  

And now, obviously the birth of our triplet sons is the next life-altering event which brings up all these same feelings again, of trying to figure out a new normal while grieving and processing the change from our former life.  

Someone asked me the other day what was the hardest part about having our triplets so far, and I quickly answered, "the loss of freedom." Yes, having one baby made me feel the same way, but soon I got a routine and rhythm down that allowed me to strap her easily into the car, and she and I were always out and about. No, I couldn't have coffee dates or lunches with friends as I did before...pedicures and hair appointments had to wait until I could find someone to watch her, but I could stroll her around Target and walk around the neighborhood.  I do admit that I remember using the word "trapped" to describe how I felt having a newborn.  

Now, with three newborns the feeling is even more so. 

 The only logical thing to do right now is stay cozy in my house...day after day after day right now...

 I'm not sure where the month of February went. Each day mixed into the next and suddenly we have three week old boys. 

Some moments I start to panic: Will I ever leave the house again?! 

This is my new life. It's more complicated, more work and way more sacrificial  than I ever imagined.

However, I have learned that adding people to my life also adds an abundant amount of joy too. There have been moments when John and I have admitted to each other that we miss our family of three. But I reminded John that when Evie was born, we said we missed our family of two. With any significant change, there is a period of transition, of trying to figure out a new normal. We are definitely in that transition period. 

I know what I'm going through right now is a slow process of transformation. My former self is being chiseled away slowly as I realize and try to make sense that my life is no longer my own, again. I mourn the loss of that. I do. 

I have  hope though, a hope that someday my life will somehow have order again and that it will feel normal to be this way. I know it will take time. I know that I must focus on one day at a time. 

John and I sometimes talk about the things we will do 20 years from now. We dream about the places we will go again and the freedom we will enjoy once again. Somehow though, I have this deep feeling that 20 years from now we will be sitting quietly at our kitchen table and say, "I miss our family of six." We will be "suddenly two" and perhaps our new found freedom will actually seem like a loss.

 So I'm doing everything I can to embrace this period of transition, to hold on to these moments even when they are tough. I pray that I am able to see beyond this, to view this period as a rapidly evolving season. 

I pray for patience, for peace and joy. I pray that friends will be able to see my divided time and not forget about me. I pray for sanity among moments of chaos, and a marriage that stays strong even when things are less than romantic.

 I pray for many things, but my most frequent prayer is that I never lose sight of what a blessing these three boys are and what a gift has been granted to John and me to raise them.