Waiting.
Waiting.
I am so grateful to be home, yet my life is very different right now.
I've been home since Monday. The doctor's orders were that I'm supposed to be sitting most of the day, but I can still waddle around the house some. The five days of strict bed rest in the hospital has made me weaker. It caused my legs and feet to swell up like sausages and made my pelvis and back less sturdy. Even in the three days since I've been able to move around, I can tell that the swelling in my feet is going down, and I'm regaining strength in my whole body. The body is not made to just lay.
My mom flew in Monday night and has been here three days now. Wow, I don't think I could be doing this without her. She came here very focused with one mission in mind: to help care for Evie, me, John and our home and then the babies when they come. And from day one, she has really taken her job seriously.
Honestly, I feel a little strange about being served and resting so much. John gets on my case if I walk up the stairs too much; my mom insists that I take naps, and she makes me egg salad sandwiches for lunch.
Suddenly I'm living such a different life! No more Costco runs. The gym seems like a dim memory. I feel like my body is deflating (and ironically growing at the same time). On those moments I long to do a kick boxing class, my mom keeps reminding me that its a short season of rest.
I am and have been continually overwhelmed by the generosity of people too. I have women I don't even know that well dropping off bins of boy clothes. My house church women brought over magazine, movies and candy. I've had people offer to make dinners, bring me Peets coffee, watch Evie and hang out. I get text messages, phone calls and emails letting me know I'm in thoughts and prayers. My in-laws moved in to our house while I was in the hospital. And of course, there is my mom, who left everything behind in Chicago and bought a one way ticket to serve us.
I am humbled.
My HOPE is that I will always remember this period of being served and be able to be generous and bless others one day too.
People ask me all the time if I think I'll make it to Feb 7. Last week I think the boys were ready for this world. And last week I would have said no. But now that everything seems to have settled again and they actually allowed me to go home, I think I have a really good chance.
Whatever happens is fine by me. Being this pregnant and having this many babies has a way of making me ok with whatever happens because it is so out of my control.
As I sat with my mom at the kitchen table this afternoon eating an egg salad sandwich, she asked me if I ever thought or imagined I'd be where I am at this moment.
Nope.
But I know I'm not the only one right now that answers that question that way. Ask yourself that same question and I bet most of you would never believe 10 years ago that you'd be dealing with or doing certain things in your life right now.
But isn't that what makes like exciting...the mystery of it all?!? Who wants to know exactly how everything is going to happen?!?
Not me.
Personally, I like the adventure, even if the adventure right now is in the waiting.
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