Letting it Go

I told John that January was our month to get stuff done. No more holidays, or pumpkin patches, Christmas events or shopping. This was our month to get ready. If all goes according to plan, our babies will arrive on Feb. 7 via C-section. 

                                      So, that means we have about one month. 

My mom is going to buy her “one way ticket” and arrive a week before the babies, and she will take full charge of Evie. That one piece alone will be so helpful, because right now it's almost impossible to be extremely productive unless she is sleeping. It's pretty much one step forward, two steps back with her. 

Good use of the triplet doll stroller

 The “post holiday haze” has left John and I both pretty exhausted most of the time. For John, it’s working full time, plus trying to sell a car, plus figuring out all the details of life( like insurance, housing stuff, etc) He's also really been wonderful in helping out with Evie and the household chores whenever he can. For me, everything lately has been daunting because my energy levels have dropped and even bending over is becoming uncomfortable. So, taking care of an active 2 year old leaves me drained much of the time.

 Then there is  our upstairs room with all the boy “things”/ diapers that need to be organized…and the basement that somehow has to be turned into a baby area…and having half our house in our current house in Beaverton and half in our new house in Tualatin. The fact that we now have an “estimated” move-in time of the end of the March means that we will definitely be in our current house  for at least 2 months with babies and all. 

Time to get ready. Time to NEST! (insert groaning of all soon-to-be fathers)

Time to let go of a lot of perfectionist expectations.
There will not be a cute triplet boy nursery to welcome our boys home to. Frankly, regarding space, things are going to be tight with us, three babies, Evie, my mother and whoever else is here helping. Our whole house needs to be rearranged.  This is truly a perfectionist nightmare.

 BUT, I’ve slowly had to let it go. I’ve had to surrender a lot of things during this pregnancy: 
1)  having 3 babies at once. 
2) having them be ALL boys. 
3) being in this house when they arrive. 

But, on the flip side, I have SO much to be grateful for. For one, I am 31 weeks and still strong on my feet and able to care for my daughter. The boys are healthy, weighing a very normal weight for this stage in pregnancy!
 I am not extremely uncomfortable. Sure I have the aches and pains of pregnancy like every woman and I’ve been a lot bigger a lot longer, but I’ve been able to walk daily and maintain some normalcy in my daily activity. My height allows me to breath too!
Recently though I’ve realized I had to give up even the small amount of exercise I was still doing. I wasn’t doing that much, but I enjoyed walking a bit daily. Since being pregnant I’ve had to cut back…more..and more..and more as time progressed. I tried to walk and do basic weights to the end but finally this week I’ve realized that there is a lot of pressure on my pelvis when I walk, even with a belt, and I’m in pain afterwards, so it’s just not worth it.  It’s just another thing I have to give up. 

So, this week we managed to start cleaning out the basement somewhat. Yes, I told John we had to clear out all the martini glasses and booze bottles from the bar area because we need to make room for formula and nursing pumps. Just what every man wants to hear about his man cave. 
Next on the agenda for this week is tackling the upstairs and organizing the clothing and diapers and all the wonderful things we’ve received the past few months. It will be quite a job. 

All this is really such good preparation for the reality of my life. Life with three babies and a toddler is never, ever going to be perfectly organized and clean. In fact, it wont even come close. 

I will always wonder why God chose us to have triplets. I think part of the reason is probably character refinement for me. There are so many parts of me that desperately need boot camp. I know that God doesn’t expect perfection from us. That is something we place on oursleves. What he desires is 110% surrender, and with that comes giving up our own pride and relying on Him for the energy, wisdom and strength to do the job-the life-at hand. This I am learning to do, again. 
So, right now we are taking each day as it comes. We will look back on this small season I'm sure and remember it fondly, when life was simple. :) 

To be organized...