Changing like the Seasons

I love seeing my kids play. I love hearing my kids play.
I love the giggles, locomotive sounds and shouts of direction and joy coming from those little bodies.
My soul is happy.

I have to say, as summer approaches, I'm not feeling the absolute dread and panic that I've felt previously.

The first summer, the boys were babies, sleeping and fussing and needing bottles around the clock. I also had two year old Evie who was restless and needed to get out and away from her crying, all consuming brothers.
Luckily we had Amanda who help me keep up with all the demands of keeping four children under two alive and happy.
That summer was an absolute blur as I tried to adjust to my new life and juggling three babies and a very difficult toddler.

The next summer was a small disaster. James still couldn't walk, and the other two were just beginning to toddle around. Parks were a nightmare. Scraped knees were an everyday occurrence.
Amanda accompanied me everywhere and still we could hardly keep up. Evie was frustrated a lot because all our attention was on her barely walking brothers and keeping them out of harms way.

Now last summer, things were a teeny tiny bit more manageable. The boys were stable in their walking but I still didn't trust them to fully listen and obey me. There was a big difference from the beginning of the summer to the end. By the end, I could kinda sorta be ok with them being in the yard with just me watching them. Still, someone was always crying it seemed, and I wouldn't dare leave them unattended or leave the safe premise of my house with them alone.

THIS SUMMER, things are already different. The boys are three and their jump in maturity and what I am able to do with them is significant. They talk. They listen. They play and can do a lot and enjoy a lot. Dare I say it...it's manageable?!
 I went to a friends house the other day for dinner and suddenly, the three boys were off exploring the house with the other boy, and Evie was outside with her friend;
 I was left ALONE with my friend and a glass of red wine. Wh, wh WHAT?!!

I can do whole days alone with them, and I don't go insane.
I took them sandal shopping solo in a store and they behaved and it was a success!
I can take the kids out by myself and feel confident (except when they all have to go to the bathroom at the same time)
I see life changing. I'm not trying to keep my head above water. I'm starting to tread....dare I say even doggie paddle forward a bit?!?
I'm really enjoying the little people they are.

Now don't get me wrong, the gleeful sounds of playful laughter are also mixed with quite a lot of fighting, and arguing and mean words.

Last week my it was my birthday and mothers day. An exact quote from John that morning as we loaded into the mini van to go to church: "Don't yell in your Mother's face today. It's mothers day and her birthday."😬

Evie is becoming quite the helper.
She volunteered to scrub my filthy patio cushions and lined them up in the sun to dry so we could use them.

She graduated from her Awanas class, singing her "cubbies song" and proudly earning her ribbon.

She even learned how to ride a bike without her training wheels!

My kids are growing up!
Summer is around the corner.
And for once, I can be excited about summer and the possibilities and the memories we will make with the kids and the family.