Our Escape

This morning I slept in until 7:45 am and I woke up feeling awake, refreshed and not irritated. I didn’t feel like I hit a brick wall. 
I didn’t even need an IV line of coffee right away. 
I felt like I was doing something wrong!

 Until I had kids, I never realized what a luxury it was to be able to sleep until you woke up naturally...even one day a week. 
I find myself now getting so irritated at people who talk about sleeping until 9 or “catching up on sleep.” Yes, I was once that person on Saturday mornings who got to sleep and wake up and then drift back to sleep and wake up and saunter downstairs, leisurely eat my breakfast in peace and then wander back upstairs to sleep again .
 The cycle of never sleeping until you are fully rested can drive a person mad. It really does affect everything: emotions, attitude, patience...the entire spirit!

If I’m being honest, I’ve been struggling in all those categories the past few weeks. I’ve felt like I am sinking deeper and deeper into a deep dark hole.  Some days I’ve felt just so  depleted I just wanted to wither away. 

 I think it’s the day to day, never ending, taking care of everything and everyone grind that just started pulling me down. 
Housework that never gets done. 
Babies who are more needy. 
A three year old who has very dramatic episodes.
Friends who I feel disconnected from.
A lot of family who is so far away. 
Sleep I never seem to get caught up on. 


I am just being honest here. Honest with my feelings. I am human, and although I Know I have so much to be grateful for and there are so so many blessings in my life, I can't help but feel worn. 

When Evie was 15 months old, John and I flew to Chicago, dropped Evie with my parents and spent 5 days in Mexico. 
I remember not caring if we even made it to Mexico. I didn't care if we flew back and forth in the air plane! We had no one else to worry about except ourselves and it was so refreshing. 
I remember we came back from that trip feeling truly married again. 

Mexico 2013

Its easy to start feeling like teammates rather than a married couple when your attentions are always on small children and household matters. 

A few months ago I was expressing this concern to one of my very dearest friends Esther. I know it's normal to feel this way in this season in life. 
She told me we needed to make date night a priority, time away a necessity in order to get through this season still happily married. 

But if you know Esther, it doesn't stop there. She comes back with a plan. 

Sure enough, later that day, she called me up and told me that she and her husband had a brilliant idea: they wanted to spend the night at our house with their three kids and take care of our four kids so John and I could get away for a night. 

At first I didn’t know what to say. It was so generous. 

John, on the other hand, was jumping around the kitchen giddy, holding up a piece of paper with the words, “Just say YES” written on it. 

After some discussing, we agreed and found a date that worked for both of us. 

January 9 was highlighted on my calendar. 
 And it honestly couldn’t have come at a better time. I was sinking fast, and John assured me this was just what I needed. 

John has always been someone who plans and surprises me with dates and outings. And this Friday was no different. He had the whole 20 hours planned, and it was fabulous. 

We left right after we put the kids down for their afternoon nap at 1:00. John’s parents came over until Esther’s family could come over for the night. 
We hopped in that car, pulled out of the drive way and really couldn’t believe we were going to be kid free for 20 hours. 


                                                    And this is why I slept in until 7:45. 
(I admit, I did hear phantom baby crying.)

I was reminded of some things I took for granted before I had kids:

1. Being able to shower as long as I want 
2. Sitting and drinking coffee and actually enjoying the coffee instead of it being consumed as  a means of survival
3. Sleeping until I wake naturally
4. Having an adult conversation and not being interrupted
5. Thinking only about yourself when getting ready to go out someplace
6. Arriving somewhere, getting out of the car, closing your door... and that's it
7. Taking a nap

And all the kids and house survived, even thrived. When I opened the door Saturday morning, Esther and Jared had all seven kids around the table eating snacks peacefully. Laundry was done and folded. Sheets changed. Bathroom cleaned. 

Um, can you say super-woman?! Can we keep all of you? 

Enough love to go around

And it was refreshing for our marriage. 
There weren’t multiple babies screaming at us, 
              toilets that needed to be plunged
 or a three year old making demands.
I wasn't exhausted. 
I felt like more than a mom.


 It’s hard to believe that this used to be our life, just the two of us to think about.  Really, it was not that long ago.
 And I know, someday, it will be our life again. 
But right now, it’s truly all about the kids. 

We decided  that we need to make date nights and intentional time together more of a priority in our life.  Having a thriving marriage affects everything. 

Sink or swim TOGETHER. 



..and maybe someday we will even float! Hehe, imagine that!

 And we will still really like each other and floating around will be fun!  


Hopefully we will be wiser, stronger, more patient; and I am looking forward to finally catching up on sleep. ;)

(But I swear I'll always hear phantom baby crying.)